The Witching Hours

Oh the irony! He's wearing a onesie bragging about me and screaming like I'm murdering him at the same time. Sometimes I feel like a bad mom, guilty for wanting him to just grow up already. I know that one day I'm going to look back and miss his adorable little baby face. I'm going to miss that intoxicating smell that releases endorphins. I'm going to wish he couldn't speak! But on a regular basis I talk to him like a grown man and wish for once he would just tell me what's wrong so I don't have to guess why he's crying.

I routinely do the checklist. I start with is he hungry? He spits out the bottle, my nipple, has milk all over his face and is still screaming. Okay, is his diaper dirty? I change it once again because literally every time I look at his diaper it's at least wet if not sharted in. Still crying uncontrollably. Okay, does he have gas? I burp him by bouncing as I walk around holding this nearly 20 lb dead weight and slapping his back like I'm doing the Heimlich. He burps, but still screams at the top of his lungs. BANKS, JUST TELL ME WHAT YOU NEED! Poor guy has no idea what he needs either, I just feel like I'm at wits end and my ear drums are bleeding.

I googled everything I could about the witching hour. I've read hours worth of articles and medical journals. Some say it's completely normal and others say clearly somethings wrong with him. How do I know what to believe? I have all these irrational fears that something is maybe wrong with him and it just hasn't been diagnosed, but when I tell his doctor she says he's colicky and sends me home with his crying ass. I don't want to miss out on these beautiful moments of his perfect infant life, but I want him to be able to speak so I know what's wrong. We did find out he has reflux, we tried medicine, it didn't help. He still gets these spells of screaming. His cries can literally make me cry. IDK what it is, but I know that it's not just me when I set him down for 3 minutes and walk away. Anyone else have this issue?

#angrybaby #momsjustwanttohavefun